Why I Went With A Midwife Over An OB/GYN For My Third Pregnancy

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Pregnancy is such an amazing time in a woman’s life and it’s also a really crazy one. 

Throw in a splash of unpredictability and you’ve got nowhere near a one size fits all approach to prenatal care. 

With that being said, I spent my first two pregnancies with the same all-black OB practice. Literally, by the time I got pregnant for the third time, I was on first name basis with all of the nurses (who I still love). 

Their office and the hospital they deliver out of is less than a three minute drive from my house and the wait time is usually really short for my appointments. And I still switched to a midwife practice and hospital 40 minutes away from me. 

Why Did I Leave My OB?

So, with all of the things I loved about my OB’s there were definitely a lot of cons to staying with them.

The biggest one was their refusal to allow me to try for a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean). Right after my second daughter was born, the doctor came in the room and told me “just so you know now that you’ve had a cesarean we will immediately schedule you for one if you become pregnant again.” 

That was so crazy to me because 1. I just got a human cut out of me in a very traumatic emergency c section and 2. isn’t it my body? How can I not choose how I deliver my baby if there’s no medical reason otherwise?

Either way when I got pregnant for the third time I guess I expected that they’d “forget” or something. I was just as surprised when during my first appointment the doctor asked if I had had a cesarean with my previous pregnancy. Then promptly told me that I would be scheduled for a cesarean again this time around.

The other really crappy thing was that no one could give me a good reason why. I had dilated to 10 cm with both of my births and my second daughter was only a cesarean because the cord had wrapped around her neck twice and was cause her to be in distress with every contraction. 

Another thing that bothered me was how in a rush everyone seemed to be. The nurses were amazing, but the doctors would act like I was bothering them by asking questions. They would be in my room for all of about 2 minutes total and even that seemed like it was too long for them. 

How hard they pushed a c-section on me was the last straw though, and was what pushed me to start looking for a new provider.

Switching To My Midwives

When I left my OB office, I wasn’t necessarily trying to find a midwife practice but mostly someone who would allow me to try for VBAC. The only problem was my insurance isn’t accepted by most of the doctors in my area who are open to that. 

I’d literally given up after about two weeks of trying to find a new provider and was going to attempt to just show up at the hospital far enough along in labor that they wouldn’t be able to try to give me a c-section. 

I was scared though because of the cord being wrapped around my seconds neck and how I would have no idea that happened if I wasn’t at a hospital. 

Thankfully I joined a couple of facebook groups for my area and was able to find my midwife practice and they took my insurance! Yay!

One of the first things I noticed was how patient the midwives were. They asked me multiple times if I had questions for them and stressed I was never under any pressure to take any medications or tests if I was uncomfortable. 

They also reassure me at every appointment that I’m a perfect candidate for VBAC. Another really cool thing is that they want me to create a birth plan to bring to my 36 week appointment to go over with the doctor. Something my other doctors would never do. 

They also offer doulas who work alongside the practice at a discounted rate, which I’ll more than likely take advantage of. 

As a whole, they genuinely seem interested in my health and getting me the birth I desire which is a huge blessing for me. In all my pregnancies this is the first time that I haven’t felt like just a number and that my wishes are valid. I am in control of my birth.

Let me know in the comments if you went with a midwife or an OB/GYN for your birth and how your experience was!

Jazmin Maybell
  1. Thank you for sharing this experience. Moms need to know that there are other options out there, do their research and make an informed decision.

  2. They can be pretty pushy when it comes to what they want you to do and I agree they did always seem to be in a rush during appointments. I think using a midwife sounds like a lovely idea.

  3. I had OBs for both my births but my second one was very much like mid wife. I wish I would’ve known about him for my first. Things might have turned out differently.

  4. I wanted to go with a midwife for my second pregnancy but because I had so many complications while I was pregnant they wouldn’t take me.

    1. Yeah, they had a few requirements for me as well! I think it helps that my midwives deliver out of a hospital and work with an OB if things were to go south and I needed a c section.

  5. I always went with an OBGYN with my three, but didn’t even really think about using a mid-wife. I think it is great to show that there are options and you have to go with what feels right for you!

  6. Midwife seeps to be the new trend for expecting mothers! Good for you for sticking with what you felt was right for you and your baby! Not every woman is the same, and I love that there are different rescources to help a woman give birth the way she feels most comfortable.

  7. I was very lucky that the hospital I went to offers both and that there is a doctor always there in case there is something that goes wrong – it’s allowed more women to choose what they would rather have instead of being stuck due to a bad situation. I loved my midwife and I’ll actually be birthing my second with the same midwife.

  8. Thank you for sharing your experience! I have heard such great things about midwives, if we have another I think we may go that route.

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